It's complicated...

 So that is part of my collection of birth certificates.  62 years ago I was born in the US Army hospital outside of  Munich, so I have a German birth certificate (the black one) and 2 different copies of  "child born abroad of American parents (one from the State Department, and one from the Army hospital).  I also have a 4th document/birth certificate that shows my step-father adopting me, but that is a different story!  My dad was an enlisted soldier in the US Army, stationed in Munich, Germany.  My mother moved to Germany to be with him while he was stationed over here...sort of.  He had to live on base in military barracks, my mother had to rent a room in a German home.  They saw each other when he had leave.  When I was born, and came home from the hospital, I lived in the bottom dresser drawer in my mother's room.  I was born in August, and my family (mother and father) came home to the US in December of the same year, so I really only lived in Germany for a little less than 4 months.

So here I am in Munich now, and a wave of emotions has hit me. I wish my mom were still alive so I could ask her so many things.  I know she loved her time living in Germany.  She had a scooter and rode around pregnant with me doing her shopping and errands...how I would like to see a photo of that!  She rented one room in a home owned by a widow,  Frau _____...I can't remember the name she used to speak of, but I know she kept in touch with her for quite a few years after we returned to the US.   I know the house in Munich  didn't have indoor plumbing so in the winter when she used the outhouse, she described having to heat a pot of water on her single hot plate in our room, then carry it outside and pour it over the seat cover to unfreeze it to lift it up.   The house must not have been in the city center...but how far out of town I do not know.  I know my mom loved the Christmas Markets and always treasured the special Christmas ornaments she purchased in Germany.  I know she was very moved by visits to Dachau, Buchenwald and Bergen-Belsen during her time in Germany.  I know she loved German chocolate (I always thought that the reason I don't like chocolate is that she ate way too much of it when she was pregnant with me!).  And I know she loved German food!  Those are the things she talked about. But I don't know much more than that about our time in Germany. As we walked today from our hotel to the Marionplatz, I began crying, thinking that my mother had walked that same path, perhaps holding me in her arms. ...perhaps buying some of those treasured holiday ornaments in some of the shops there.  I know it wasn't an easy time of her life, but she always seemed to have such fond memories of that time and place!  I think that is what motherhood does for you - I makes you focus on the good and beautiful parts of your life,  that miracle of new life, and gives you the strength to endure some of the harder parts. My mother certainly wasn't perfect, and we definitely had our differences as I grew up.  But I know she was a very good mother to me and we had a very special time in Germany together.  In a weird way, I feel very close to her here in Munich.  When planning this trip to Europe, we talked about going to Berlin...but it was important for me to come see the city where I was born.  And I am so glad we made that change in our itinerary that enabled me the chance to come to Munich, giving me a glimpse of the life my mom and I shared for 4 months.

We happen to be here in Munich during Oktoberfest, which is ironic since Gary can't drink beer due to his Celiac diagnosis, and I don't really like beer.  When I originally realized the timing of our trip I was disappointed that we would be here with all the Oktoberfest tourists...but then I began to think that Oktoberfest is such a big deal that many many people plan their entire visit intentionally to be here during this festival - the largest beer festival in the world - I got kind of excited.  My excitement began to increase when we boarded our plane yesterday and had several lederhosen clad young men on the plane...the city is now swarming with lederhosen and dirndls...on young and old.  Some are kind of costume-like, but most are the authentic thing.  The majority of the young men wear the short pants, the older men wear lederhosen that come just below the knee.  There is an assortment of vests, jackets and knitted cardigans paired with their embroidered suede lederhosen and knee socks.  Similarly, the young fräuleins are wearing short, saucy dirndl dresses...the more mature women are wearing ankle length dirndls and aprons.

We had a "magical moment" at breakfast when I looked out the window and realized that we had a birds eye view of the Oktoberfest parade!   We really had no idea the parade went down this street! We saw the horse drawn wagons carrying the barrels of beer through town, headed for the fairgrounds where the beer tents are set up.

They were followed by several marching bands and more wagons carrying various organizations (all in full Bavarian garb).   Actually, it was more than "several" bands...we lost count, maybe 30 bands?!?

Most wagons were set up with full tables surrounded by people drinking beer and eating pretzels (this is 10am!).  There is some tradition of heart shaped lebkuchen...many people wear these cookies on ribbons around their neck...some of the parade fräuleins were tossing them to the crowds along the sidewalks...I guess it is like tossing Mardi Gras beads (minus the boobs!).  Now I understand why the young girl gave us cookies on ribbons at the baggage claim at the airport yesterday...you can bet I will be wearing my cookie today when we go to Oktoberfest!!!  I'll wear a cookie - but no dirndle!